It’s been over a year since my last post. In all honesty, I didn’t think I would return. I’m not sure why I stopped blogging, except maybe due to a lack of ideas and an unrealistic expectation that I needed to create something of value. I’m sure part of the reason was life “getting in the way.” Too much to do at work, too little time doing things I enjoyed. I had to pick-and-choose what activities I would spend my limited free time on. Blogging seemed like such a chore. I couldn’t compete with the big boys and girls. I’m too much of a perfectionist and I set myself up to fail.
What is different, you may ask. I started The Artist Way (re-started is more apt) by Julia Cameron and have been working through the tasks. Things have started to change, slowly and every so delicately. I enrolled in a journaling course that started today. I guess I just feel like writing. Not for anyone else. Just for me.
I’m not sure what I hope to gain. Or maybe I should just say, I hope to gain. I hope to free myself of fear, eradicate my negative thoughts, let go of the things I cannot change. In a nutshell, I hope to sort myself out. And some of that is going to end up on this page. Fair warning.
I am reminded of Robert Frost’s poem The Road Not Taken, a sad reflection on missed opportunity:
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way
I doubted if I should ever come back
But here I am.